Offensive Call

When I first heard in Mr. Starke’s 7^th grade Bible class that we are called to be a peculiar people, it set a small spark inside of me. I admit that I have struggled with worrying about what others think of me (sometimes I still do), but I have always held in the back of my mind that I am supposed to be different. God is so creative, He gave us all a unique personality, quirky character traits, and our own personal sense of self, largely determined by those things that surround us in life. We are all different. Sometimes, I have confused my peculiarities that are God ordained with those I  picked up naturally from my environment.

For instance, I was not taught how to wash clothes until I was leaving for college. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to know, my mom was just very picky about how the clothes were washed. However, because of the timing, I too became very particular about how my clothes were washed; more so than my mom. All my towels have to be folded a certain way. They and my wash rags must all face the same direction. In college, it had gotten to the point that they were color coated, but I gave that up after I was married. There are some people in my life that this quirk absolutely drives mad. “It’s just a towel,” someone said. But to me, it is more than that. To me, having everything neatly laundered is having a spirit of excellence. I live by the motto that there is a place for everything. I work from home, so my primary objective is to keep the house smelling fresh and looking clean. I almost find an identity in my housework; it is a source of pride for me.

While you may not all have a border line obsession with keeping the house clean, you have those eccentricities that may "you" uniquely "you". No one else can have your you-ness. It’s really alright that we don’t follow a crowd or stereo-type! The fact is, not everyone is going to love you and your quirks. In the same way, we can expect resistance as Christians for having a “peculiar” standard of living. And if I may be so bold, that’s how you know you’re living your life according to the Word. I am in no way implying that we should purposefully become hated by acting like a crazy lunatic; but  people will be offended, if you live according to the Word, by your Christianity. I am grateful to live in a country that is considered a Christian nation. However, having morals is becoming increasing met with opposition. It is considered offensive if my opinion is different that what is becoming the new "norm". People who do not agree with me scream at me to be tolerant, while they have no tolerance for my opinion. It seems the Bible and the principles of Christianity are offensive.

While I make no apologies for my opinions, I can see that in a day and age where the motto is “Do what you want to do as long as it doesn’t offend me,” people can think taking a moral stance for or against anything is baffling. I mean, who bases their beliefs and opinions on anything other than selfish gain anymore? Doesn’t it make more sense to live your life the way you want to as opposed to following an ancient set of standards that have governed civilization for thousands of years? It may seem like a hard pill to swallow, but Christians will not be liked by everyone; we never have been. And when it becomes all too easy to be offended that some people refuse to like us based on our personal beliefs, consider the death of our Savior on the cross. Jesus was crucified, a sinners death, because He met the same opposition we face today. The Word of God tells us that in the end times, we will be pitted against each other. Brother against brother, sister against sister, daughter against mother- when we have a heart change such as Christ offers, and we agree to start standing on principles we may have never had before, we will offend some people.

With that said, we are called to love on people- despite how they treat us. How’s that for offensive? We need to lay down our pride, and realize Christianity is completely about servant-hood. It is our duty as Christians to show people the love of Christ. I will not mention specifics but there is a controversy going on in the fast food industry. I would challenge you that if you happen to see that particular controversy going on around you, to choose love. LOVE people, no matter what, with the same love Christ lavishes on you. Buy them a meal, refuse to be offended, show someone the love of God instead of just talking about it. Sit down and have a conversation with people instead of bashing and hating and destroying them. This is an awesome opportunity to show people the REAL love of God, something many may have never seen. Choose to be different. Choose to be set apart. Love simply for the fact that you are loved. Refuse to let offense turn you away from the opportunity to minister the Gospel to some body!

Prayer:

Gracious Father.

Thank You for lavishing Your love on me. Help me Father to love people the way You do. God, help me to see people through Your eyes. God, we all have worth. We all have a purpose and a destiny for our lives. We are all called to live with the same passion for people Christ did. God, cause us to conform to Your mold, even if it hurts our pride and selfishness. And Lord, give me the opportunity to minister to some body that is hurt and broken. Help me to have a gentle spirit and to not be offended when people don’t love me just because I follow You. Lord, You are God of all. You are still in control.

In Jesus Name, Amen.

Scripture References:

1^st Peter 2:9 (KJV)

But ye are a chosen generation, a royal priesthood, an holy nation, a peculiar people; that ye should shew forth the praises of him who hath called you out of darkness into his marvellous light:

Proverbs 19:11 (NIV)

A man's wisdom gives him patience; it is to his glory to overlook an offense.

1 Corinthians 13 (NKJV)

1 Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I have become sounding brass or a clanging cymbal.2 And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing.3 And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, but have not love, it profits me nothing.4 Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; 5 does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; 6 does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth;7 bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.8 Love never fails. But whether there are prophecies, they will fail; whether there are tongues, they will cease; whether there is knowledge, it will vanish away.9 For we know in part and we prophesy in part.10 But when that which is perfect has come, then that which is in part will be done away.11 When I was a child, I spoke as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child; but when I became a man, I put away childish things.12 For now we see in a mirror, dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in part, but then I shall know just as I also am known.13 And now abide faith, hope, love, these three; but the greatest of these is love.

Galatians 5:11 (NKJV)

And I, brethren, if I still preach circumcision, why do I still suffer persecution? Then the offense of the cross has ceased.

Matthew 13:21 (NKJV)

yet he has no root in himself, but endures only for a while. For when tribulation or persecution arises because of the word, immediately he stumbles.

Matthew 16:23 (NKJV)

But He turned and said to Peter, Get behind Me, Satan! You are an offense to Me, for you are not mindful of the things of God, but the things of men.

Matthew 18:7 (NKJV)

Woe to the world because of offenses! For offenses must come, but woe to that man by whom the offense comes!

Acts 24:16 (NKJV)

This being so, I myself always strive to have a conscience without offense toward God and men.

Matthew 11:6 (NKJV)

And blessed is he who is not offended because of Me.

Matthew 15:11 (NKJV)

Not what goes into the mouth defiles a man; but what comes out of the mouth, this defiles a man.

Romans 14:13 (NKJV)

Therefore let us not judge one another anymore, but rather resolve this, not to put a stumbling block or a cause to fall in our brothers way.

Matthew 24:10 (NKJV)

And then many will be offended, will betray one another, and will hate one another.

Romans 16:17 (NKJV)

Now I urge you, brethren, note those who cause divisions and offenses, contrary to the doctrine which you learned, and avoid them.

Isaiah 8:14 (NKJV)

He will be as a sanctuary, But a stone of stumbling and a rock of offense To both the houses of Israel, As a trap and a snare to the inhabitants of Jerusalem.

Matthew 13:41 (NKJV)

The Son of Man will send out His angels, and they will gather out of His kingdom all things that offend, and those who practice lawlessness,

Proverbs 17:9 (AMP)

He who covers and forgives an offense seeks love, but he who repeats or harps on a matter separates even close friends.

Love LIFE (LoveIsForEver):

Instead of talking about your hunny today, I am going to challenge you. Remember that we are called to love and care for the broken and down-hearted. We are supposed to be a light in a dark world. Love is not easy. I don’t care what every love song in the world says. Love is tough and hard and sometimes dirty and unkempt. Please please please use the current controversies facing Christianity to LOVE people the way Jesus does. In scripture, He did not tolerate sin. But I’m pretty sure He never bombed anyone in His Father’s name, or shouted abusive, offensive words because some one was not living according to the moral standard. We are not called to be wimpy Christians. There is an obvious battle between good and evil going on. But for too many years, we have gone about things in a wrong and hurtful manner. Love doesn’t necessarily mean being a push over, but it isn’t selfish either. The definition of selfishness is not sharing the love of God.

Song Reference:

Courageous by Casting Crowns

Choose to be courageous by standing up for your beliefs and values. Don’t back down because it isn’t popular. I think Casting Crowns does an excellent job of getting the point across in this song. 

Debt Free: There's A Scripture For That...

I hate debt. I think about all those people who can’t pay their bills on time; not out of will not but out of can not. I have been there before. Nevertheless, I hate debt. When my bills come in, I try to pay them as quickly as possible. It’s not always easy, but we pay tithe, so the Lord always makes sure we have enough. I am grateful, though, to serve a God who is more than enough. When we can not supply for ourselves, He is our supply. I used to have an agnostic friend who would joke, “Yes, but when you’re hungry, you can’t eat Jesus.” I would just laugh and shake my head. As much as I tried to explain the principle that Jesus will always supply your needs, he could never understand.

When my husband and I moved to St. Louis in the winter of 2008, it was rough. We had the opportunity to move there with a job he had at the time. They paid for the U-Haul and down payments, fee’s and first months rent on our apartment. We just had to pay for food and rent. I was skeptical from the beginning, because “if it sounds too good to be true, it probably is” was a statement I grew up hearing. The job was a sales position, and my husband was lured there with the promise of better opportunities, better pay, possible millions to earn. Hahaha…. When we arrived there, they did make good on their promise about the free stuff. But St. Louis was a waste land when it came to opportunity. I had been in a trade school in Mobile, and there was not an opportunity for me to finish with the move. Every where that I asked was either not hiring, or not hiring me. And my husband would go out every day only to have door after door shut in his face. The economy had been hit harder there than it had in Mobile, and we were at a loss. Eventually, my husband got a job at a local restaurant making a decent wage. The hours were long and stress ran high, but we could pay our rent and we had food. But as for paying our bills, that was out of the question. I had always been a follower of Dave Ramsey, but even he couldn’t help me now. It was out of control.

I guess the company was nice enough to cover our payment for breaking the lease, because the first opportunity we had to move home, we took it. We arrived home on April 1, 2009, a day that will forever be burned in my memory. It was the day I stopped taking the little things for granted; the day I learned to appreciate the beauty and friendliness of the South; the day I swore I would never complain again about living for free in a house that Jer’s family graciously let us live in. But I could not move away from the bills. They had been neglected for so long, I was afraid to even look at the balance. I prayed and the Lord gave me an excellent temp job that allowed us to get caught up, and I was even able to pay off a few bills. LETMETELLYOU- there is a freedom in knowing that your debt is paid!!!

Before we came to Jesus, we had a debt we could not pay- not even if we wanted to. Our Creator knew that we were in need of salvation for the debt of sin, sickness and hell, so He sent Jesus to come and die so we could live!! What a Mighty God we serve that He would pay a debt that we owe. It was not easy for Jesus to get on that cross. Even He prayed, asking if there was another way. But He was gracious enough to die so we could live! Hallelujah!!! The only thing we have to do to accept that salvation, that freedom from debt, is accept our Savior! It’s not too good to be true. Upon salvation, we are no longer bound to sickness, there’s a scripture for that; we are no longer bound to death, there’s a scripture for that; we are no longer bound to condemnation, there’s a scripture (and a Savior) for that!!! Thank You Jesus that we can walk in that freedom forever! Until next time, may the Lord bless and keep you; may He make His face shine down on you; may you walk in the goodness and mercy of God forever!!!

Prayer:

Lord Jesus,

Thank You that You paid a debt that I owed. Lord, I can not repay Your kindness, but I will serve You all the days of my life. Give me strength to be like You, to love like You Jesus.

In Jesus Name, Amen.

Scripture References:

Romans 13:8 (KJV)

Owe no man any thing, but to love one another: for he that loveth another hath fulfilled the law.

Romans 13:7 (KJV)

Render therefore to all their dues: tribute to whom tribute is due; custom to whom custom; fear to whom fear; honour to whom honour.

Psalm 37:21 (KJV)

The wicked borroweth, and payeth not again: but the righteous sheweth mercy, and giveth.

Proverbs 22:7 (KJV)

The rich ruleth over the poor, and the borrower is servant to the lender.

Luke 7:40-44 (NKJV)

40 And Jesus answered and said to him, “Simon, I have something to say to you.” So he said, “Teacher, say it.”41 “There was a certain creditor who had two debtors. One owed five hundred tdenarii, and the other fifty. 42 And when they had nothing with which to repay, he freely forgave them both. Tell Me, therefore, which of them will love him more?”43 Simon answered and said, “I suppose the one whom he forgave more.” And He said to him, “You have rightly judged.”44 Then He turned to the woman and said to Simon,

Romans 8:1 (NKJV)

There is therefore now no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus, who do not walk according to the flesh, but according to the Spirit.

Isaiah 53:5 (NKJV)

But He was wounded for our transgressions, He was bruised for our iniquities; The chastisement for our peace was upon Him, And by His stripes we are healed.

1 Corinthians 15:54-58 (NKJV)

54 So when this corruptible has put on incorruption, and this mortal has put on immortality, then shall be brought to pass the saying that is written:  “Death is swallowed up in victory.” 55 “Oh Death, where is your sting? O Hades, where is your victory?”56 The sting of death is sin, and the strength of sin is the law.57 But thanks be to God, who gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ.58 Therefore, my beloved brethren, be steadfast, immovable, always abounding in the work of the Lord, knowing that your labor is not in vain in the Lord.

Love LIFE (LoveIsForEver):

Stress can really hurt a marriage. If you find yourself overwhelmed: First, give it to Jesus and Second, do something that puts you in your “happy  place.” Take an extra long bubble bath, write in a journal, or sip slowly on a latte and read a good book. I know you can’t escape the world forever, but a few minutes each week really add up. Remember, when you don’t take time to unwind, it effects every area of your life.

Song Recommendation:

If you haven’t already, check out singer Jason Upton. His song “Give Me One Reason” has always helped me put things back in focus. You can check it out on Youtube or Itunes.

"The Choice Is Up To You My Friend"

For my birthday, my sweet husband gave me a Kindle. It’s just the basic e-reader, not one of the newer ones, but it suites my purpose just fine. I’ve just began reading The Hunger Games trilogy this past weekend, and I am captivated by the main character’s battle with choice. Last night, I had to literally force myself to put the Kindle down and go to bed. I’ve averaged about five hours of sleep each night in the past week, and it was beginning to take it’s toll on me. I’ve been so busy doing other things, I have neglected sleep; and, personally, that has an odd effect on my body.

I started noticing the signs yesterday afternoon as I was attempting to clean the kitchen after I made dinner. When I don’t get a proper night’s sleep, my mind gets foggy, I become lethargic, and I really stop feeling like doing anything. So when I noticed yesterday that I was struggling through my housework, a task I usually truly enjoy, I knew I had to make a different choice. I had to chose to finish what I was doing, and go to bed. All the other work would patiently wait for me until morning; I needed to make a better choice. Often, I have had to take a step back from what I was doing and decide I needed to make a better choice. We all do. Every day, from the moment we wake up, we are flooded with a thousand choices to make: do you get out of bed to start your day or chose to stay in bed; do you stop and grab a donut on the way in to work or make some scrambled eggs and oatmeal; do you make that hard choice to end a friendship that is not encouraging your walk with Christ or let the past dictate your future. We all have choices to make.

Because we serve a God that wants us to chose Him, He gives us options everyday. In the Old Testament, Joshua is speaking to the Israelites about the choices they are making, reminding them that they have a choice whom they will serve. He ends with, “But as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.”  It’s a choice. Everyday, we have to choice to serve the Lord, even though we may not understand what we are going through. Everyday, we have to decide that we are going to do what the Word of God tells us to do, and carry our cross daily. Everyday, if we choose Christ, we have to die to the things we want to do or say, and let Him speak though us. Choose for yourself who you will serve, but I can tell you that I am going to trust the Creator to know what’s best for me; my family and I serve the Lord.

It is not always easy to make the right choice. A lot of religious people will tell you that it should be, but choices are not always black and white. We have to gage every choice we make against our Instruction Manuel, pray about it, wrestle with it, and then rest in the peace of God if we know we made a Godly choice. The fact is, if Christ is not the foundation for every choice we make, we fail.  Remember that your choices dictate your consequences.

(P.S. For those of you it’s driving crazy, it’s from Who’s The Boss’ opening song.)

Prayer:

Gracious Father,

Thank You  that I am given options everyday to live for You. God, help me make the best choices when it comes to serving You. Lord, I want every thing I do in life to glorify You! In Jesus Name, Amen.

Scripture References:

Joshua 24:15 (NIV)

             But if serving the Lord seems undesirable to you, then choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve, whether the gods your ancestors served beyond the Euphrates, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land you are living. But as for me and my household, we will serve the Lord.”

Proverbs 10:20 (NIV)
            The tongue of the righteous is choice silver, but the heart of the wicked is of little value.

Psalm 16:4 (NIV)
Their sorrows shall be multiplied who choose another god; their drink offerings of blood will I not offer or take their names upon my lips.

James 4:4 (AMP)
You [are like] unfaithful wives [having illicit love affairs with the world and breaking your marriage vow to God]! Do you not know that being the world’s friend is being God’s enemy? So whoever chooses to be a friend of the world takes his stand as an enemy of God.

Proverbs 3:31(NCV)
Don't be jealous of those who use violence, and don't choose to be like them.

Proverbs 16:16(NCV)
It is better to get wisdom than gold, and to choose understanding rather than silver!

Psalm 25:12 (NKJV)
Who is the man that fears the LORD? Him shall He teach in the way He chooses.

Proverbs 12:26 (NKJV)
The righteous should choose his friends carefully, For the way of the wicked leads them astray.

Love LIFE (LoveIsForEver):

Love is definitely a choice. Everyday we have to choose to love our spouse in spite of yesterday’s hurts, in spite of how we may feel. Remind your spouse today of why you choose to continue loving them. The more you remind them, the more you build up their admiration and love for you. Love is not about getting what we want, it’s about attending to a need greater than ours.

Good Day everyone! Today is my birthday, and my sweet husband will be filling in for me. Don’t worry, I’ll be back Saturday!! Hope you all have a great weekend! May the Lord bless and keep you!!

-Tree

I AM

In a modern world where masculinity is challenged and mocked openly, TV shows have dumb witted fathers who back down to their children and wives, femininity is common place for men, and pornography attacks the very concept of what men are supposed to desire, it is hard to know what authentic masculinity is supposed to resemble. Many males in the past few generations grow up not knowing what a father is supposed to be and how a real man should act, and this causes a vicious cycle that repeats until knowledge is introduced to it, not to mention the women who don’t know how a man should treat them. Thank The Lord that I had not only a great father to teach me but a grandfather and a couple of uncles who took the time to invest in me, and in some cases make me tougher. But I am one of the lucky ones not every guy gets that chance.

Here is the secrete no matter if you had a dad, a step dad, an absent dad, or two dads, G-d is the ultimate example of Authentic Manhood, and womanhood but that is a different blog.

When Moses asked G-d who he is He said, “I AM.” Plain and simple. I AM. What does that mean? Well it means He is – what ever you need Him to be. It means that He is always there, He is your wisdom, He is your strength, He is your answer to what ever question or need you have. G-d gave us a perfect example to follow I AM = Authentic Manhood. Now just like every other man that has ever breathed before you, you are not perfect and never will be until you are in Heaven.

Several months ago I read a book entitled 5 Star Man by Neil Kennedy, great book I highly recommend it. However after reading this book I realized how far I was from authentic manhood. See I have had some issues to flare up in our marriage that have nearly destroyed it, and I needed to take a real hard look at who I am. At that time in my life my I AM statement would have consisted of I am selfish, I am angry, I am lazy, I am addicted to porn. There was little redemptive quality to my manhood. But somewhere into our second year of marriage I started to realize that I needed to change or I was going to lose my wife. I’m not going to say that it was an over night change or that I don’t still have to daily climb on my cross die to myself and let G-d define me, but I really started to make changes.

Through this and other books devoted to the topic of manhood I have come to know that it is more than throwing a football, killing a trophy buck, landing the corner office, or some fancy degree its about having the attributes of G-d, the fruits of the spirit, and living a humble life (I’m not saying you have to become a monk or give up your hobbies but you have to learn how to incorporate them into G-d’s design for you).

Shortly after reading 5 Star Man I developed an I AM statement:

I AM loving and kind to my wife

I AM in control of my anger and addiction

I AM a tither

I AM an example to those around me for Christ

I AM a provider for my family

I Am Authentic Manhood

This is not the full statement but it is an example for you. Remember that G-d is your full example for A.M.

I would like to think my wife for giving me this opportunity to share my heart on her blog and wish her the very best on her Birthday. Love you Babe.

Prayer

Dear Lord,

Thank you for being the Father to the fatherless, for being our example, and being gracious to forgive us short comings. Help us to learn how to become more like you and better men. Thank you for loving us. In Jesus holy name I pray. Amen

Scriptures references

Exodus 3:14 “G-d said to Moses, “I AM WHO I AM. This is what you are to say to the Israelites: I AM has sent me to you.

Galatians 5:22-23 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law.

Thought builder

Take some time to sit and talk to G-d and write an I AM statement.

If you haven’t in a while take some time to talk to and think the men who have shaped who you are.

LOVE Life (Love Is ForEver)

Rethink your relationship with your wife and children and using your I AM statement to rebuild your relationships. Remember the only thing left of you after you are gone is your legacy so make it a good one.

A Matter of Trust

One of the hardest elements to gain in a relationship is trust. It takes intimate knowledge to build a strong foundation for trust. If that trust is broken, the relationship is broken; it can take years to regain deep trust. Trust is necessary if we are to maintain any relationship in life. The more we know about a person, the easier it becomes to trust them.

In college, I was always cynical of the relationships that ended in marriage mere months after they began. My friends and I would have in depth conversations about how it seemed impossible to really know someone enough to marry so quickly. Fast forward to 2007, my husband and I transitioned from courting to marriage in less than seven months. It was a whirlwind romance, and it still is today. I could only have married him in such a short time due to the intimate trust we shared, and a strong reliance in Christ. We have been through many trials. Trust has definitely been stretched and tested. But I am grateful that we have been able to rebuild time and time again, because we trust in God. More than any other trust relationship I have in my life, my trust in Christ is absolutely unshakeable. I have faith in Him to help me through the hard times. What’s more, He is worthy of our trust! The more we rely on God, the more intimate our relationship is free to grow. Think of it like this: You might ask a complete stranger to take a picture of you, but you would never hand them your debt card and ask them to pick up a few groceries for you. But, you would have no problem handing that debit card over to your spouse. You can have rely your better half (hopefully). God is the same way. When we first begin our relationship, it might seem difficult to take our problems to Christ because we are so used to handling them on our own. But the more we confide in God, the more we learn to give Him 100%, the more we become assured that we can cast our burdens on Him, because He does care for us. Trust is a byproduct of love.

Our role in our relationship with Christ is to trust fully and not depend on our perceptions for answers. God’s role is to direct our paths and make them straight. Trust is a give and take. I think of how the woman with the issue of blood must have felt as she pushed her way through the crowd that day. According to Jewish tradition, she was considered unsanitary. But she did not care. She was trusting that when she got to Jesus she would be healed. And when Jesus finally caught a glimpse of who touched Him, He confirmed that her faith in Him made her whole. It can be scary to have that type of faith. There is often a fear that if we trust Jesus, He might let us down. I just want to remind you that God always answers prayers, sometimes in ways we can not understand. A strong foundation in trust will help us remember us that God did not create us to get everything we want. We were created to have fellowship with our Father.

Learning to trust in a broken world is not easy. We come to know from a young age that even our hero’s will let us down when we need them most. But Jesus will never leave or forsake us. Trusting Him even when it seems hard is an essential ingredient to having a fulfilled life.

Prayer:

Dear God,

I pray that when the challenge comes to trust You, I will find myself worthy in Your eyes. Help me to always point the way to You, oh God, and trust that You have great things in store for me. Thank You that I can trust You to supply my every need. In Jesus Name, Amen.

Scripture References:

Psalm 20:7 (NIRV)

Some trust in chariots. Some trust in horses. But we trust in the Lord our God.

Psalms 4:5 (CEB)

Bring righteous offerings, and trust the LORD!

Psalm 56:3 (NIV)

When I am afraid, I put my trust in You.

Psalm 33:21 (NIV)

In Him our hearts rejoice, for we trust in His holy name.

Psalm 56:11 (NIV)

In God I trust and am not afraid. What can man do to me?

2 Corinthians 3:4 (NIV)

Such confidence we have through Christ before God.

Proverbs 3:5 (NIV)

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding.

Psalm 31:14 (NKJV)

But as for me, I trust in You, O Lord; I say, You are my God.

Psalm 37:3 (NKJV)

Trust in the Lord, and do good; Dwell in the land, and feed on His faithfulness

Psalm 115:11 (NKJV)

You who fear the Lord, trust in the Lord; He is their help and their shield.

Nahum 1:7 (NKJV)

The Lord is good, A stronghold in the day of trouble; And He knows those who trust in Him.

Love LIFE (LoveIsForEver):

A true act of trust is sharing intimate moments. If you haven’t had a heart to heart in a while, take a few moments to have an honest conversation with your spouse about some things that are going on. Let them vent while you listen with an open heart, and be willing you offer a few words of encouragement at the end. Make sure you thank them for their honesty and willingness to share.

Follow The Leader

Since we've moved into our apartment, we’ve been having a difficult time finding a church in which to settle. Jer and I have visited several churches, almost all of which have been very welcoming. The people are great, the worship is phenomenal, but for some reason or another, we just don’t feel like we “click”. This has been especially difficult for us because our church in Alabama was AMAZING. The very first time we walked in, we felt the presence of the Lord; we felt immediately like family. It had really been as easy as walking through the doors to find “home”.

Suffice it to say, when the television is on, I am watching a Christian station. There is just something about being fed the Word of God all day long that makes me even more hungry for righteousness. I don’t love all of the shows on any particular channel, but generally I can find something to watch on the eight or so Christian channels. There is one show in particular that I will always watch if it is on, “Fan or Follower”. As a brief synopsis, the narrator is telling the story of a man that we watch flow from fan to follower to Jesus. The church we revisited this week happened to be finishing up a series called, you guess it, “Fan or Follower”. While generally I could have walked up to the pulpit and gave the sermon myself based on my own mental notes and years of attending church, the pastor really put a fresh spin on the topic and gave some really great insight. I love a pastor that makes you want to write down every word he says! The real epiphany for me came at the very end of the sermon. The pastor was talking about following Jesus at His pace. Of course I have heard that phrase a million times, “God’s timing is perfect.” But something really connected in my spirit the way he worded that phrase. “Follow Jesus at His pace.” Suddenly, the Holy Spirit whispered to me, “We do not go out before Him, we follow Him.” Ok, I admit, many of you may be confused because this is such a rudimentary statement, but for me, this was one of those moments that allow God to gently put me in my place.

I am a Type A personality. I am a perfectionist, and I hate to wait for anything. Even when I am not, I am always on the go. I am a fast walker. My husband is 6’4 and he has a hard time keeping up with 5’0 me most of the time. So when I want something in the Spirit realm, I go load up my water pistol and charge hell, and this is how the conversation usually goes: “Ummm, ok Jesus, any day now…… I’m waiting…. What can I do to speed this process up????  Oh, You want me to wait…. Patiently…… HAHAHAHAHAHA… Oh, You’re serious….” This was the moment I realized I had been going about things the wrong way. I’m supposed to wait patiently on Jesus, walking with Him instead of running ahead scoping things out, and like a bad sit-com always getting myself in a world of trouble. As a fan, if things don’t go my way, I would just give up and move on to the next thing. But as a follower of Christ, I made a commitment to wait on Him. The Bible tells me that waiting on the Lord renews my strength.

If we are patient and wait on the Lord, He will refresh us and nourish us with His loving kindness.  I have to constantly remind myself that the way He does things verses how I would do them is not the same, Thank You Jesus!!! I have made a mess of things too many times not waiting on His timing to think that I know what’s best for me. I know there will still be times when I will run out ahead, thinking I have a clue about what’s going on. But isn’t it wonderful that we serve a God who will help us up when we fail Him, and still makes good on His promises!

Waiting is rarely easy. We live a society that values quantity over quality, because the quicker we can finish one task, the quicker we can move on to the next. But God does not respect time the way we see it in the human realm. He makes it abundantly clear that if we are going to follow Him, we have to wait for His lead. He loves us so much, and wants the very best for us. He is an amazing God!

Prayer:

Heavenly Father,

Thank You so much God that you are willing to wait for us sometimes. Lord, please don’t let me be a stumbling block to myself. God, I want all you have for me. Help me to realize that Your timing is always perfect.

In Jesus Name, Amen.

Scripture References:

Psalm 130:5 (KJV)

I wait for the Lord, my soul doth wait, and in His word do I hope.

Psalm 25:21 (KJV)

Let integrity and uprightness preserve me; for I wait on Thee.

Galatians 5:5 (KJV)

For we through the Spirit wait for the hope of righteousness by faith.

Psalm 59:9 (KJV)

Because of His strength will I wait upon Thee: for God is my defense.

Isaiah 40:31 (NIV)

But those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.

Hosea 12:6 (NIV)

But you must return to your God; maintain love and justice, and wait for your God always.

Love LIFE (LoveIsForEver):

If you don’t already, I challenge you to have a family fun night. Board games, cards, or homemade crafts are a great way to encourage bonding and increase self esteem with your children. Uno anyone?

Walk By Faith

We all have those moments in life that define us. Not those moments that allow others to define us, but those moments that truly allow us to see that we are stronger than we think we are. Until a few months ago, I struggled with being a people pleaser. It was easier to do what someone else wanted me to do. Somehow, it took less faith. Somehow, it took the guess work out of my life. While I thought this gave me freedom, I realized I was walking in bondage. We are not all called to do the same thing. Each one of us has a unique God-given talent. Sometimes, using that talent takes a leap of faith, as in my case.  

For me, doing what other people wanted me to do was a twisted concept of Christianity. I thought that as long as it looked good and I earned respect from others, it was the right thing to do. I struggled to write the true story of what happened that really set me free, but then I realized that being candidly Christian meant putting the truth out there; whether it was beautiful or ugly, it is truth and it has to come out. Recently, I worked in the banking industry. Despite popular belief, there is nothing inherently evil about banks. I had a good job, making a decent wage, and I felt like I had more respect. But I was miserable. I shouldn’t have been. I met all my goals, was friendly to customers; I knew my job. But something was missing.  In short, one day I had a break down; not a break though, a literal break down. I was a mess. I had gotten one bad shop and it sent me over the mental edge. (For those of you who don’t know, bonuses and raises- on most retail jobs- are given off of the number of PERFECT 5 scores an employee receives. One score of “four”, and it’s considered a “bad” shop.) I have been mentally exhausting myself, doing everything in my power to please our customers and I still wasn’t good enough. I couldn’t take it. I took the rest of the day off without pay. It was a Friday and I knew if I could just get home to rest, I could be ok. At the prompting of my boss, I called the employee assistance line. I was being brutally honest, and I didn’t care if it was reported or not; I had to get it out.

This is where my break though came. This moment I will never forget. I was sitting on the phone with the counselor and she said, “It seems like you do a lot of things to make other people happy.”  I paused for a moment and said, “Yes, I’m sort of a people pleaser. I always have been.” Then she asked me a question that changed my life: “How would it feel to do something for yourself, even if it made other people unhappy?”  I won’t go into all the sorted details, but something inside me changed that day. It was as if, for the first time in my life, I had permission to be me. I knew the Lord was calling me to write. I didn’t know where or how to get started. I just knew that if He was call me to it, He would walk me through it.

Little had I know, suppressing the gift the Lord had given we was a form of walking in disobedience. My pastor used to say, “Obedience brings blessing, disobedience brings pain.” And I was in turmoil for years because I was not doing what my Father called me to do. For me, writing to you (my audience) is a ministry. Not just a ministry to you, but a ministry to myself. The Word tells us to encourage ourselves in the Lord. Sometimes, we have to do things that line up with the Word of God that will displease other people.

Walking by faith is not always easy. When the bills are piling up and there is more week than paycheck, it’s easy to get discouraged. But God promises that if we put our trust in Him, we will have every provision we need. Walking by faith requires not knowing where you are going, but trusting the Guide to get you there.

Prayer:

Gracious Father,

Thank you for all of Your provision. I thank You Lord that if You call me to walk by faith, You will equip me with the tools I need. Thank You Father that I can put my trust in You fully. You are my All in All. In Jesus Name, Amen.

Scripture References:

1 Samuel 30:6 (KJV)

And David was greatly distressed; for the people spake of stoning him, because the soul of all the people was grieved, every man for his sons and for his daughters: but David encouraged himself in the Lord his God.

Psalm 26:3 (NIV)

For I have always been mindful of your unfailing love and have lived in reliance on your faithfulness.

Psalm 86:11 (NIV)

Teach me your way, lord, that I may rely on your faithfulness; give me an undivided heart, that I may fear your name.

Psalm 101:6 (NIV)

My eyes will be on the faithful in the land, that they may dwell with me; the one whose walk is blameless will minister to me.

Romans 1:12 (NCV)

I mean that I want us to help each other with the faith we have. Your faith will help me, and my faith will help you.

2 Corinthians 5:7 (NIV)

For we live by faith, not by sight.

Thought Builder:

Stop for a moment and consider your talents. Are you using them in a God-glorifying way?

How can you help someone, who may not know how, discover their God-given talents?

What are you doing to encourage your talents and the talents of others?

Love LIFE (LoveIsForEver):

For a fun date, take your love to a local “paint-your-own” ceramic store, or go to your local craft store, and pick a funny ceramic that represents something to each of you. Even though they may be against it at first, it will encourage bonding and conversation. Exchange ceramics at the end of the date, and explain why you chose that specific piece.

Worth

For years, I struggled with feeling worthless. In the months leading up to meeting my husband, I struggled with bulimia for the second time in my life. I have always tied how I looked to how I feel. I care about what other people think about me. I think most do to some point; that’s why we leave the house with decent clothes on, our hair maintained, and teeth brushed. There is an acceptance tied to our apperance.

I don’t think there is anything particularly wrong with having a healthy respect for what other’s think about you. Many times, I have rethought my wardrobe before leaving the house thinking, “Is this appropriate? If someone from church saw me in this outfit, would I be embarrassed?” You get my point. It’s when that nagging voice becomes an overwhelming obsession that it becomes its own monster, and begins an unhealthy reign opposite of how God feels about us. Once, when we were living in Saint Louis, my husband and I were playfully arguing over who was smarter. What started out as teasing, escalated into a very angry discussion.

I was livid. My husband continued to tease me, not understanding the offence I was truly taking, until I burst into tears in an angry rant. He asked me why I so upset. At that moment, I couldn’t understand why I had let something as innocent as a joke get me worked up. When I opened my mouth and the words came flowing out, I could not believe what I was saying. Without thinking I uttered, “Because if I’m not the smart one, I don’t have anything left.” We both sat in silence for what seemed like an eternity. I sobbed openly as emotion came flowing out. I explained that when I was younger, my Uncle, who was drunk, told my sister that she had always been the pretty one. In fairness, I have never had much respect for this relative, but his words cut to my core. When he realized the injustice of his words, he tried to make it better by telling me, “Well, Trina, you have always been the smart one.”  And for a really long time, I carried that with me. I let being smart define me, since I would never be pretty. I suffered needless pain and heartbreak because I chose to believe what someone I did not even respect spoke over me.

I have to say, being married has not made my struggle with self-image any easier. My husband and I have been through more in our short marriage than most people see in a lifetime of marriage; but I love him. And if God is faithful to forgive, I should be as well. These struggles have been blessings in disguise. Had I continued to depend on my husband for my worth, I would still feel broken and desolate. Thank God for a revelation!! Once, in the midst of a particular marital struggle, I began begging God for an answer, “WHY! Why God am I having to go through this?” His answer was simple, “Because if I had given you everything you wanted, you would never learn to depend on Me and My Word for your confidence.” What He was telling me was that I had been so consumed with letting other people define me and my worth, I had failed to remember from where my worth truly came.

Though the world tells me that I am not good enough, God tells me that I am fearfully and wonderfully made. When I am feeling depressed about my image, God is the lifter of my head. God chose for me this temple (my body) He did for a reason. And though I am working on years of damage to it, He is helping me rebuild my temple one day, one promise at a time.

I encourage you, if you are dealing with self-esteem issues, run to your Loving Fathers word for a reminder of who you TRULY are. The Word says that our adversary, the devil, roams about like a lion, plotting who he can destroy. The world will try to tear you down, but Christ comes so we can have an abundant life. When we learn to put our trust in Him, we learn that He will never let us down. I want to be so saturated in His Word, the lies of the world can not sink in. Our worth is not tied to how we feel or think, but directly to the promises and testimony God lays out for us in His Word.

Prayer:

Gracious Maker,

So often, we look to others for our worth. Remind us everyday of the loving destiny that You have created for us. Remind us, Oh God, that You have a purpose and a plan for us, no matter how we feel. Thank You God that Your mercies are made new every morning and that we have an new opportunity to walk in Your love and peace everyday.

In Jesus Mighty Name, Amen.

Scripture References:

Proverbs 30:5 (KJV)
            Every word of God is pure: he is a shield unto them that put their trust in him.

Psalm 3:3 (KJV)
            But thou, O Lord, art a shield for me; my glory, and the lifter up of mine head.

Psalm 121:1 (KJV)
            I will lift up mine eyes unto the hills, from whence cometh my help.

Psalm 50:2 (NCV)
            God shines from Jerusalem, whose beauty is perfect.

Ezekiel 28:17 (AMP)
            Your heart was proud and lifted up because of your beauty; you corrupted your wisdom for the sake of your splendor. I cast you to the ground; I lay you before kings, that they might gaze at you.

Proverbs 31:30 (AMP)
            Charm and grace are deceptive, and beauty is vain [because it is not lasting], but a woman who reverently and worshipfully fears the Lord, she shall be praised!

Psalm 149:5 (AMP)
            Let the saints be joyful in the glory and beauty [which God confers upon them]; let them sing for joy upon their beds.

Psalm 139:14 (NKJV)             I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Marvelous are Your works, And that my soul knows very well.

1^st Peter 3:3-4 (NIV)

3 Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes.4 Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight.

Thought Builder:

Do you find your worth in the Creator or are you still struggling with the world’s definition of beauty?

Love LIFE (LoveIsForEver):

I am personally guilty of not reminding my husband that I think he is handsome. Offer your love a kind word today, and remind them that their beauty is one of the reasons you fell in love with them.

(Jer- I think you are handsome, even when you wear that silly bow-tie. I love you.)

What can you do to encourage someone else that will allow the glory of the Father to shine through you?

Unconditional

In a moment of honesty, I have to say, I have struggled with unconditional love. More, I struggle with the premise of unconditional love. When my husband and I were dating, we had an amazingly undeniable connection. I knew he was “the one.”  But as struggles begin to hit our marriage, and the impoliteness that we missed during dating reared its ugly head, my mind and my heart begin to fill with doubt.

For me, our love was contingent upon my happiness. It wasn’t until years later when I heard a pastor mention something I’ve heard a thousand times that I remembered that my husband STILL IS the one that God hand picked for me. The pastor was reminding us that our failures and disappointments in life are something to rejoice in as much as our victories. These are the challenges that cause us to remember who we are in Christ and cause us to trust Him with our good and our bad.  My mind immediately raced to the day I fell in love with my husband.

I had loved someone in the past, and it left me heart-broken and feeling worthless. But my husbands love gave meaning to my life; it started to heal wounds that he didn’t cause- wounds that shouldn’t have been there anyway, but that’s a different issue. When I found out he loved me, a thousand arrows could not quench the love I felt for him. It was the most amazing love I had ever felt in my life, with the exception of how I felt when I found out Christ loved me.

This was one of those moments when I began to heal. I realized that I was the one holding us back because, in my quest for unconditional love, I overlooked my need to love unconditionally. So, you know…. I’m working on it.

I will never utter to you, in sincerity, that I think I am perfect. I know I have my share of flaws. If my goal in life is to be like Christ, which it is, I must learn to take the rejection along with the triumphal entries just like He experienced, and love His people all the same. I can now walk in the knowledge and freedom of unconditional love because of His love for me.

Prayer:

Gracious Father,

Thank You for Your unconditional love. I thank you Lord that I do not have to earn Your love, I can just walk in it. Lord, help me to love others the way You do. Amen.

Scripture Reference:

1 Corinthians 13:1-8 (NIV)

If I speak with the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophesy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast, but do not have love, I fain nothing. Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trust, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. But where there are prophecies they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away.

John 3:16 (NIV)

 For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life.

Romans 5:8 (NIV)

 But God demonstrates His own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.

1 John 4:8 (NIV)

Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love.

1John 4:18 (NIV)

 There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.

Song of Solomon 1:2 (NIV)

Let him kiss me with the kisses of His mouth- for your love is more delightful than wine.

Thought Builder:

Are you allowing yourself to love unconditionally? Are you really walking in your unconditional love with the Father?

Are you currently holding on to a disappointment that is restraining you from feeling fulfilled? What would it feel like to let it go?

Love LIFE (Love Is ForEver):

I challenge you today to really do something that shows love to your spouse. Make them a homemade card, send some “Shari’s Berries” just because, or buy them a book they’ve wanted to read. Love doesn’t always have to be extravagant. Usually, it’s the little things a person does that means the most.